Love & Jane (2024)

These Jane Austen-inspired movies are going to make me hate Hallmark. Just when the Christmas movies were getting better. It’s time for Love & Jane.

Lilly (Alison Sweeney) is obsessed with Jane Austen novels. When her life begins to go awry, she wishes she could ask the author for advice. That night, the ghost of Jane Austen (Kendra Anderson) appears to help Lilly through her difficult times.

Yes, this is as dumb as it sounds. Lilly, a rather self-centered woman, doesn’t like technology and thinks everything was better in Jane’s time. Of course, she works for a marketing company and uses a movie version of Siri or Alexa. But technology, bad. And, from what we see, her entire life revolves around Jane Austen. It’s pretty annoying and I have no idea why anyone puts up with her.

I’d talk about the guys in the movie but they are barely there. Lilly breaks up with her boyfriend, Martin (Matthew Kevin Anderson), is the beginning of the movie because he gets a job in Chicago. (Even though he noted that she could move there if she wanted…) But the big romantic interest is Trevor (Benjamin Ayres), who is a client of her firm. He basically pops in now and again to remind us that he exists even though he has no real effect on the plot. This movie really is a romance movie between Lilly and Jane.

There are a few more movies coming up in the Loveuary catalog. I hope that they are better than this.

Rating: D

Merry Magic Christmas | 2023 Christmas Movies

The Lifetime movies are the ones that I go into with the least amount of knowledge. There better be some magic in Merry Magic Christmas or I will be mad.

Beth (Patricia Isaac) is a financial advisor who has been tasked to help a local theater survive an impending financial crisis. Nate (Andrew Dunbar) happens to run the theater and he’s terrible at finances. At dinner at a Chinese restaurant with her best friend Coley (Corey Woods), Beth’s fortune cookie tells her to keep an eye out for 624, a special angel number. Can Beth survive being inundated by 624 and save the theater at the same time?

The biggest thing that annoyed me about this movie is Nate. Every time Beth tries to tell him that the theater will close unless they can raise the funds to cover their bills, Nate just shrugs and says it will work out. He doesn’t want to sell memorabilia from past shows; he doesn’t really want to ask patrons to donate money; he thinks the money will magically appear for no reason at all. I used to work in the theater. I have family that works in the theater. Theater people are not like that. Theater people will do whatever they need to in order to keep their art going. I hate Nate a lot.

If we look past him (which is difficult since he’s the romantic lead), the rest of the movie is fine. The angel number thing is a little annoying. There aren’t any hints about what 624 means, it just keeps appearing everywhere. When she sets her alarm clock for 6:30, it goes off at 6:24. When she is riding her stationary bike for 5 miles, the meter randomly changes to 6.24 miles when she’s done. When she sets a timer for 5 minutes to hard boil some eggs, it refuses to time anything but 6 minutes, 24 seconds. These things mean nothing. What is she supposed to get out of this 624 number? (Spoiler: It’s Nate’s birthdate.) It is a stupid plot device that is badly used.

Ratings: 624 out of 1,000,000

Baking Spirits Bright | 20201 Christmas Movies

A movie about how awesome fruitcake is. We’re really going there? OK, Lifetime. You’re the one that said it.

Varma Fruitcakes is a family-owned company that makes fruitcake. When her parents hire an outside marketing company for their holiday marketing, Mira (Rekha Sharma) is concerned that it will make the company look bad. Will her traditional values be reflected in Brady’s (Dion Johnstone) marketing campaign or will the company go bankrupt?

Let’s start with the truth here. Fruitcake is disgusting. No amount of marketing will make anyone under the age of 60 want to buy it. Your company should really branch out into other baked items.

With that out of the way, let’s talk about Baking Spirits Bright. I hate this movie a lot. And the reason I hate this movie is Mira. This entire movie is based on Mira not wanting to do anything to update the family company. She wants everything to stay just like it was when she was a young child. I’m sorry but, if you want your company to succeed, you have to change with the times. You can’t grow if you want to stay exactly the same.

I’m also annoyed at the two marketing campaigns we are shown. Brady gives us a retro campaign. Fine. He gave into Mira’s irrational fears and came up with a fairly cute campaign. However, we also see a social media campaign from Brady’s junior co-worker, Finn (Riun Garner). This campaign seems solely based on giving some sample products to YouTubers and letting them do whatever they want. That isn’t how a social media campaign works. Companies give the influencers an idea of what they are looking for and the company vets the videos before they go live. No one is sitting there chewing on their fingernails as they watch the videos to see what is said. And why in the world would Finn pick a “Dare channel” to market the product? That is the only influencer we see in the campaign. It was a very stupid decision.

There is seriously nothing redeeming about Baking Spirits Bright. Stay far away from this one. I’m sure there will be plenty of baking-related movies to take its place. This one, and its fruitcake, belong in the trash.

My Christmas Family Tree | 2021 Christmas Movies

Ah, the orphan plotline. It can be used to make such a feel-good Christmas movie. Or it can make you feel sad and lonely. Let’s see where Hallmark went with My Christmas Family Tree.

Vanessa (Aimee Teegarden) was orphaned when she was nine years old. Now an adult, she takes a Family Tree DNA test. A few days before Christmas, her test returns a paternal match. Has she found the family that she has dreamed of?

I know, this sounds like it would be a schmaltzy movie where everyone adores everyone else. On the contrary, My Christmas Family Tree adds the right amount of skepticism to the love fest. Sure, her new father, Richard (James Tupper), and his family accept her into their family immediately, Richard also shows a bit of doubt that Vanessa really is his daughter. Even Vanessa has some doubt. I think that it offsets what could be a terribly cheesy scenario.

To be honest, I found myself enjoying the movie. I loved the way that Vanessa didn’t try to force her way into the family. She was just nice to everyone. When the kids were having a difficult time, she would talk to them like they were real people, which is a rarity. Most people treat kids like they are idiots or dolls they can play dress up with. Vanessa is there when they need someone and she doesn’t talk down to them. It’s the way people should act around children.

The romantic part of the story is actually the sub plot. Vanessa isn’t there to find her one true love. She’s there to find who her family is and where she comes from. The romantic love is the cherry on top of the happiness sundae. Sorry, Kris (Andrew W Walker), you’re kinda irrelevant here.

I would recommend watching My Christmas Family Tree. Especially if you are looking for a movie that is sweet but not syrupy, full of love but not overly romantic, and has just the right amount of Christmas. Good job, Hallmark.